


A Confession With Flowers and...Words...

by slitchy_chan



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: But also, Canon Compliant, Dialogue Heavy, Episode: s03e04 Gwaine, Eventual Romance, Flowers, Fluff, Gwaine Flirts (Merlin), Language of Flowers, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Oblivious Merlin (Merlin), Pining Gwaine (Merlin), Protective Gwaine (Merlin), Slow Build, Slow To Update, Strangers to Lovers, Why isn't that an official tag?, for like 3 seconds, soft merlin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:33:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29495121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slitchy_chan/pseuds/slitchy_chan
Summary: Gwaine wasn't one to turn away from someone attractive that caught his eye, he was always up for a one-night-stand the few times he found someone mutually sober and appealing for it, but something about Merlin had caught further onto him, the foreign feeling of wanting more than just pleasure and a night of sweet nothings made him apprehensive and positively enthralled.[Or]After being cared for by Merlin while he recovers, Gwaine finds new and foreign feelings for the servant have him making foreign romantic gestures to court the lad. How hard could it be to get his attention? Apparently, it's harder than necessary pining after the oblivious servant.[Set in s3e4 "Gwaine"]
Relationships: Gwaine/Merlin (Merlin)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 65





	1. [1] Definitely A Stranger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a test[?] post of an idea I had for a Merlin/Gwaine piece to see how I feel about it after having it up.  
> I PLAN for 5-ish chapters, but if I feel iffy about it as I continue writing then I'll replace it with the original super short one-shot I already have completed.  
> Feedback is greatly appreciated!

Gwaine's head ached worse than the pain in his leg. 

His mind stirred at that. Why did his leg hurt? And why was his _head_ aching? A _headache_ after a day or night at the tavern wasn't new, but this time he felt a _source_ of pain in his head. The events of the previous day slowly came flooding back, his mind providing him with unhelpful fuzzy memories of the tavern he was at, the blokes he'd helped, the knife in his leg- _the knife in his leg?!_

He jerked upwards, accompanied by a painful twinge in his leg that confirmed his clouded realization. Bleary-eyed, he squinted as he scanned the unfamiliar room; though any room would be unfamiliar to a man like him whose bed most days was a cold floor. 

The door opened moments later and in walked in someone that _was_ familiar. 

"Oh, you're already awake!" the raven haired boy grinned as he entered the room. Gwaine remembered him from the bar fight, _also_ remembering his first conscious thought had been about the blokes _ridiculously_ prominent ears and cheekbones.

"What am I doing here?" Gwaine sat up, his posture stiff.

"You were wounded." he provided. "Arthur wanted to ensure you were treated by his personal physician."

Gwaine narrowed his eyes at him and wracked through his hungover brain to recall the lad's name. Even exchanged amidst the chaos of a bar fight, his memory recalled it clearly. 

_Merlin_.

Merlin's words finally caught up to his muddled mind. 

"Arthur?"

"...Prince Arthur. You saved his life." Merlin's expression mixed between surprised and amused while Gwaine didn't even hide the unpleasantness he felt in his plaguy frown. Great, good to know he was injured and in pain all for saving a spoiled prince. Gwaine scoffed.

"I probably _wouldn't_ _have_ if I'd known he was a noble." he adjusted the pillow to help sit him upright, wincing as he did so. 

"Well- he- Arthur is a good man, if you overlook the title." Merlin moved to his bedside and set down the tray of food on the nightstand. Gwaine eagerly reached for the water cup. 

"If you say so." he shrugged, taking a hurried drink. Merlin watched him with careful eyes, unable to tell if it was his subconscious saying to stay close in case he needed something or if he'd just wanted to stay close. 

"The king wishes to thank you in person." he says to fill the silence. Gwaine nearly choked on the water, quickly pulling it away and shaking his head. 

"Ah, no thanks-" he hurriedly said, "I'll pass. I've met my fair share of kings and trust me, once you've met one you'll have met them all." he grimaced. 

Merlin was intrigued by Gwaine now. It wasn't often he met men who would turn down a thanks from the king or some kind of recognition for their heroic actions. He pressed the matter.

"He'd probably give you a reward." Merlin was testing him now.

"I'm not interested." Gwaine swiftly responded and began eating the food provided. Merlin was admittedly a little baffled at the casual dismissal. "Besides," Gwaine paused, turning and gesturing to his belongings that were neatly resting on the hook by his bedside, "I have everything I needed right here." his smile returned. 

Merlin wasn't sure what to make of the strange man. One second he thinks he can understand him, the next he's a stranger again. He thinks for a moment longer, letting his mind make a decision for him to switch to a different-ish conversation. 

"Back at the tavern yesterday, you helped us... Can I ask why? It's not like you _needed_ to step in." he was truthfully very curious about what his intentions had been- if he even _had_ any intentions- because Gwaine really didn't need to step in. He hadn't known he was coming to aid the Prince of Camelot, he could've stayed blended amongst the crowd and not had to deal with it _or_ the aftermath that'd followed.

"Your lads' chances of winning looked next to none," he grinned, something short of mischievous glimmered in his eyes "guess I just like the look of those odds." Gwaine winked.

Back to a stranger. 

"The odds turned in our favor with you there. I'd say we came out lucky, but... your leg." he frowned. Gwaine waved it off. 

"I've had worse." he replied too casually for Merlin.

_Definitely_ a stranger.

Gwaine resumed eating, paying no mind to Merlin while he watched. Merlin's stare curiously lowered to the necklace around his neck, but then found his gaze going over the man's lower body, and the moment he realized his eyes had wandered his face flushed and he took a staggering step back. 

"I, um- I'll... I'll leave you to your breakfast. I have to go serve Arthur." he pointed to the slightly open door and backed up to it. "I-I'll come by to check on you later." He briefly met Gwaine's eyes before fleeing the room. 

He leaves his chambers with thoughts of gentle brown eyes flooding his mind. 

[-]

Gwaine had rested for a bit longer after Merlin left, and a couple candlemarks later he was now awake and uncomfortably stiff.

He was eager to get up and move, confident that the pain in his leg had subsided enough to let him. He gave it a quick once-over to make sure it wasn't dulled from a potion and would hurt or worsen if he was moving when he shouldn't be. Satisfied with the stitches and bandages feeling firmly set, he stood to test his range of movement around the small room.

Merlin hadn't told him that it was his room, but Gwaine could tell almost immediately that it was. It was littered with what looked like various lists all in different handwriting, a few bits of medical supplies, books (some that made Gwaine frown), but he also noted a few various trinkets that seemed a little too exclusive for a servant to have. 

The biggest giveaway was the dark, slightly torn red neckerchief neatly folded and settled away on the nearby desk beside a needle and thread. It was the one Merlin wore yesterday when they met, duly noting the dirt and ale stains on it, but upon a closer inspection he realized some were also blood stains. Merlin must've used it to help against his injury at some point, not that Gwaine would know since he'd been unconscious at the time. 

A wave of embarrassment overcame him because _oh Gods-_ he'd fucking _knocked himself_ out against a seat bench. _Fuck_. 

He promptly justified his humiliation with _I was stabbed and lost balance._

Letting out a heavy sigh, he set the neckerchief back down on the desk. At least it wasn't the _worst_ state Merlin could've seen him in; earlier that morning hadn't been all that innocent. He hadn't missed when Merlin's eyes ran along his open torso and was completely and shamelessly flattered by it, he probably would've tried teasing the poor lad if he hadn't retreated. Gwaine thought Merlin was handsome, he had a nice, thin face, attentive blue eyes that he enjoyed looking into and an enchanting smile. 

He abruptly found himself with further thoughts of Merlin, mostly of prominent cheekbones and full lips. 

He wasn't one to turn away from someone attractive that caught his eyes, he was always up for a one-night-stand the few times he found someone mutually sober and appealing for it, but something about Merlin had caught further onto Gwaine,the foreign feeling of wanting _more_ than just pleasure and a night of sweet nothings made him feel apprehensive and positively _enthralled_. 

He dressed himself quickly and exited the room, not too sure where in the castle he was actually located. Merlin had said something about Arthur wanting him treated by a personal physician so physician's chambers was probably a good start. Gwaine briefly considered the thought that _Merlin_ was Arthur's personal physician, but not only were there signs of two people living here, Gwaine couldn't figure out how to properly word it, but in the most respectful way possible Merlin also just seemed too credulous and ingenuous to have such a grueling job. 

He was thinking too much about Merlin. 

Gwaine hastened himself out of the room and made for the lower town. 

It felt good to be out in the open; it helped to clear his mind a bit.

He was able to take in the small part of what made up all of Camelot. There were shops, open barter stands and to his delight, plenty of rather fetching young women that caught his eye. 

As he walked, his attention was caught on a passing young woman with long, curly brown hair and light dark skin that beautifully contrasted her pastel purple dress. She paid him no mind as she continued past him, her focus was elsewhere. He abruptly turned to another young lady walking the opposite way of him carrying a basket of various flowers. He quickly plucked one from her bunch and hurried after the captivating woman.

"I believe this belongs to you." Gwaine spoke once she turned to acknowledge him, her eyes met his before trailing down to the outstretched flower he held. 

"Sorry, I don't think so," she gave a polite smile, moving to sidestep him and continue walking, "it's not really my color." 

Gwaine took a few steps back to follow and keep her attention. 

"Think so? Let us see, then." he paused to give her the chance to push him away, but seeing none he reached forward and gently tucked the small flower behind her ear. 

Once in place, his hands retreated. Her expression gently fell into an indifferent smile. 

"I'm sure you have plenty of those to hand out, hmm?" she challenged. 

"Yours is the only one." he smiled, showing his now empty hands. She let out a faint breathy laugh and moved to continue walking. Persistent, he held his hand out and kept his smile up. "I'm Gwaine." he greets. Clearly uninterested, she takes his hand and gives it a gentle shake, nodding in recognition and moving forward. Gwaine lightly tugged on her hand to turn her around, still gentle to the young lady. "And you are?" he smiled. 

She wasn't keen to answer, which was fine. He was starting to acknowledge his advances weren't getting anywhere, fine with continuing this until she wasn't. He lightly stepped to rotate them, giving her the most charming smile as he decided to see how far she'd let him go with his ridiculous antics. 

"You look like a princess to me, so it must be something like Ciara or Esmerelda." he grinned when her face scrunched to something mixed of amused and aversion. "That must be it then," he gave a small bow, "Princess Esmerelda."

" _Stop_ **-** people are staring." She wore a forced smile now. 

"You haven't told me your name yet." he goads. 

"It's Gwen." she hurriedly answered. Gwaine stood up straight.

"There, that wasn't so hard, was it?" he took a step forward, but she moved to keep walking, basket clenched tighter than before. He reached out and gently took one of the handles. "Let me carry that for you, a princess shouldn't have to carry around her laundry." 

She let out a defeated sigh and turned to him. 

"Unfortunately, I'm not a princess." she half smiled. 

"You are to me." he all but purred, searching between her eyes for a reaction. He wasn't all that surprised when she suddenly burst out laughing. His lips pressed into a thin line after a moment and he gave a small chuckle. "This isn't working, is it?" 

"I'm sorry, but no. I like that you tried though, and that you know when to give up..." she smiled, it widened after a moment, " _eventually_." she teased.

"Tell me then, is it me?" he pouted playfully.

"Not necessarily... but, there was something in your eyes." she gave him a knowing look. "You're not interested in me, not actually. You're thinking about someone already. Maybe feeling a little indifferent about it." she said, letting her words settle in his mind. She reached up and took the flower from behind her ear and handed it back to him. 

"Here, maybe you can give it to your intended." She gave him a friendly smile.

"What if I don't have one?" his eyes narrowed playfully. 

"I'm sure you don't." she teased, continuing on walking down the street.

He was left standing there baffled and amused. He placed the stem into his mouth, swarmed with newfound thoughts and feelings. He absentmindedly chewed on the stem of the flower while he pondered.

He settled on it was the right _gesture_ , not the right _person_ , and that he knew who the right person _was_.

Gwen's words were jumbling in his mind, making him ponder more than he wanted to as he continued walking. He was surprised to find himself admitting hewas truly _fancying_ someone, not _desiring_ someone, and the thought of blindly pursuing it made nervousness rise unpleasantly inside him. He'd never done something like it before and the risk of not only rebuffing rejection but also being disdained was weighing heavily on him. 

Or maybe he was overthinking this and needed to shut up and _try_. That shouldn't be too hard, right?

He first needed to find a way and let them even _know_.

He looked around the market area till he spotted the young girl who he'd procured the flower from and approached her. 

He asked a simple question, she gave a simple answer, and with that he went off on his way. 

And that was how Gwaine found himself sneaking into the royal gardens.


	2. [2] Not Of His Own

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter update uwu, turns out, I don't hate it!
> 
> I do have to give a heads-up though. As I continued writing this I ended up going a much more unpleasant way. It still follows the episode, but the scenarios in the episode aren't very,,,nice,,, anymore, not that they were nice in the first place BUT- you'll see what I mean. 
> 
> I hope you're enjoying so far :,)

_"This is my servant Merlin. He loves hard work, so consider him at your disposal should you need anything."_

Merlin swears those were going to be Arthur's last words. 

It's not the first time he's had to put up with an unpleasant knight or two throughout his time as a servant, but he has _never_ encountered men of nobility quite like Sir Oswald and Sir Ethan.

They were cruel and demanding men, it hadn't even been two hours yet since their arrival. The _moment_ Arthur had left him to them they effortlessly made his job that much harder; they demanded for whatever reason that _he alone_ carry all their belongings to their room, they mocked his face and body- not even wanting to _think_ about how Sir Oswald had been openly and uncomfortably ogling him, some stares lingering a bit too long.

The worst was that he couldn't do anything against it, they were knights and he was a servant. That didn't stop him from cursing them in his mind each time they were rude or outright unpleasant. They began to give Merlin a bad " _they could become a threat_ " feeling, which led to the only _good_ thing to come out of this is that if they _were_ a threat, specifically and worryingly to Arthur, Merlin had direct and discreet access to them.

"What took you so long?" Sir Oswald sneered down at Merlin as he entered the room. He practically collapsed to the floor with the last chest of their belongings the moment his muscles went slightly lax under the ridiculous weight. Sir Oswald and Sir Ethan had grown bored of him after a while, mostly because of Merlin's eventual lack of reaction to their words, and had left to settle into their chambers, leaving him to haul their things up the stairs and to their room.

"What?" he breathed a laugh as he confusedly stared at the man, "It weighs a ton! S-Sire." he hurriedly added the title at the end. The man's unwavering stare was, well, _unwavering_ as he glowered down at the servant. "Seven- i-it's seven flights of stairs..." Merlin uselessly rambled and he awkwardly shut himself up. He warily rose to his feet and rubbed at the shoulder that took most of the weight. 

"That's very kind of you." Sir Ethan suddenly said. Merlin's tense face softened for a second to a small smile, he was pretty sure it was the first and only nice thing he'd heard from either of them. Taking it as a sign of dismissal and entirely eager to leave, he began to back up to the door. He didn't get more than two steps when Sir Oswald spoke _again_ , because nothing was ever easy with men like this. 

"You can't leave it there." his words terse, taking a long drink of wine from the goblet beside him.

"Sire?" Merlin tilted his head. 

"It's in the way, you fool. Move it." He used the goblet in hand to gesture to the chest. 

"O-Of course sire. Sorry sire. Where would you like it?" Merlin complied. He hadn't pieced together at first that they were drinking, which meant that depending on how much they'd had, leniency with Merlin's _merlin-ly-ness_ would be very slim. 

The two men shared a look, before Sir Ethan nodded to the bed. 

"Over there by the bed." 

Merlin followed his eyes, deciding it was better to just comply; he gave a small shrug and prepared himself for the weight. Well he _wasn't_ prepared for the weight and felt a strain on his body as he heaved the chest to the bedside. He'd just gracelessly dropped to his knees with it a second time when Sir Oswald _fucking spoke again_. 

"Oh, no, the other side." he smiled. Merlin caught on now to their toying with him, the bad feeling in his gut stirred unpleasantly. Knowing he wouldn't be able to pick it up again, instead he casually dragged it along the floor to the other side of the bed. He could feel their eyes on him, it made his shoulders tense and his guard raised. He kneeled as he moved to push it into the corner between the bed frame and wall. 

"You look good like that, boy. Are you often down on your knees?" Sir Oswald was leering closer to him. Flabbergasted and admittedly a bit alarmed, Merlin stumbled to his feet and spun around to face them and their suggestive eyes. He needed to leave. _N_ _ow_. 

"If that'll be all..."

"For now." Sir Oswald stood, slightly swaying as he took the few steps closer to the servant. His hand reached out and grasped under Merlin's chin, tilting his head up. "We'll require your _services_ again soon. When we do, you are to come immediately and obey. Understand?" his tone lowered to something no noble man should ever possess.

Merlin refused to meet his eyes, instead keeping his gaze locked on the neatly drawn curtains to his right.

"Y-Yes sire." 

" _Look at me._ " he growled. Merlin did. "Understand?"

No longer trusting his voice, he meekly nodded his head. 

Sir Oswald looked at his lips now, the longer he stared the more Merlin's dormant magic began to manifest under the intimidation and fear. He eventually let go, albeit a little _harshly_ , and stepped back down to his chair. 

"You're dismissed." Sir Ethan waved him off.

Merlin bowed to them. 

Terrified, shaking and disturbed, Merlin hastened himself out of the room and away from the two. He was halfway down the staircase before it all caught up to him. He dropped down to sit on a step and recover himself before he gave out and ended up falling down the stairs.

He felt _sick,_ his lingering anxiety provided the nerve-wracking thought that as long as he was alone with them, he was helpless. He couldn't use his magic to defend himself without revealing (and condemning) himself, and given the staggering physique the two knights stood at, _with_ or _without_ magic, he was helpless. 

He wished he could see Gwaine, Merlin thinks he would listen.

He pushed himself past the wall he'd leaned against and forced himself down the hallway. He didn't know what to do or even if there was anything he could do. All he knew was that it was avoidable until it wasn't. 

Now down at the laundry room, thankful to see it devoid of other servants, he was able to continue on with his chores. He had Arthur's laundry to do, he had Gaius's list of items to gather, and he had Gwaine's dirtied and bloodied clothes to wash.

As he starts with Gwaine's clothes, making sure to get out the dirt and blood. There was still a hole in the fabric from where he was injured, so he mentally reminds himself to get thread to patch it up. He let his thoughts run wild and useless in an attempt to keep himself distracted from thinking about what'd happened with the two visiting knights.

Instead, he thinks of the aroma not of his own emitting, of ale and earth. He thinks of gentle brown eyes, creased as they meet a smile.

He affectionately thinks of Gwaine.


	3. [3] "I'm your friend, I'm happy to help."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hi!  
> In the last chapter, I changed a piece of dialogue to help with an idea for this I had in mind. It's not much, literally just two words, but the dialogue from Sir Oswald has been changed from   
> "you are to come immediately" to "you are to come immediately and obey."  
> It doesn't seem like much of a difference but holy hell- it really fucking is- 
> 
> I hope you're all continuing to enjoy this! Thank you for the lovely comments so far, they've been encouraging me :,)  
> -C

Gwaine had a lot to say about palaces.

Granted he never had anything _good_ to say about them, but he still had plenty to say. It was mostly on the things royals tended to have around their castles and how much it reflected them, having encountered enough nobility more often than he liked to see that Kings would almost _always_ have some kind of outlandish display of power. It was mostly statues, but he encountered the occasional large painting(s) or gold and jewel fixtures.

But as he rounded the corners of the many halls of the castle, he was amazed to see all the impressive artifacts the King seemed to collect. While yes they were technically symbols of power out for display, they looked like they were worked for, like they were _earned_. He felt for a brief second some of his disdain towards Pendragon's diminishing. 

With his newfound knowledge, as he turned to the open hallway that led outdoors to his destination, one thing he could say about Camelot's royal gardens was that it was truly _astonishing_. 

The garden was huge, much larger than Gwaine was expecting, and had a lot to look at. He noted the different flowers that lined the ground, all beautifully arranged and impressively healthy, the short and neatly trimmed hedges that divided the garden into sections and the surprising _quietness_ of the place.

It was clear the gardens were feverous-ly cared for...which means he had to be attentive and cautious to pull this off without getting caught.

He had entered in the main way from within the castle, but it was safe to assume there were other entrances that guards or servants could use, so he needed to be quick.

Gwaine had one rather _useless_ advantage right now, one that he was certain that he'd never confess to in this lifetime, and that was he knew almost exactly what he was looking for.

With a rough up-bringing that was almost entirely fatherless, it fell to him to look after things at home while it fell to his mother to take care of everything else. Later on, part of his responsibility was taking care of his older sister, Ciara. 

Ciara was a being of pure energy and curiosity; she loved to look, listen and learn no matter what it was. She would often share her newfound knowledge with him, despite knowing he rarely ever listened, but occasionally she managed to get him to tag along on her short traverses through the nearby meadows to show him her knowledge about earth, life and its creations.

Life takes back its most precious creations, and unfortunately Ciara was no exception. 

Sometime around her nineteenth winter, she fell sick. W _orryingly_ sick. The physician that came by once a month throughout outlying villages confirmed that she wouldn't see her twentieth.

She spent what remained of her life teaching what she could to Gwaine, and this time he listened to every word she had to say.

She loved flowers, spending a lot of time after receiving the grave news talking about them with Gwaine.

He thinks of her as he maneuvered through Camelot's royal garden, making sure to stay close to the larger hedges that would provide easy cover if need be and made his way through. He finds himself moving along a hedge of familiar looking flowers, a small dark green base with decently sized white flowers scattered within.

_"How can there be so much to say about these things?" Gwaine frowned at the small green bush with white flowers nearby where Ciara had stopped them. He knelt down and picked one past its stem, plucking the small leaves off. "They're just plants."_

_"They have meaning." she'd said, carefully kneeling beside him and copying him._

_"What does this one mean then?" he turned to her, subconsciously bending the stem around his finger._

_"Gardenias are a bit complicated." she began, her eyes lighting up as she visibly grew excited, "But they're pure, gentle almost. You'd give them to someone you care about."_

_Gwaine glanced to the flower in hand, then back to Ciara. Wordlessly, he reached forward and gently tucked it behind her ear, the curled stem securing it in place._

Caught in his thoughts, he failed to remain focused on listening for the presence of another.

"I hear Sir Leon withdrew from the melee earlier this morning." a female's voice reached his ears, sounding dangerously nearby.

" _Shit_." he mouthed, quickly crouching as low as he could get and ducking his head, hoping the hedge in front of him was tall enough to effectively shield him.

Gwaine could've sworn the voice was familiar, but his mind was too focused on staying out of sight to entertain the thought further. He waited till he heard absolute silence once again before cautiously rising from his spot and moving on. 

He only had a vague idea of what he was looking for, he didn't have anything specific come to mind that he thought would be fitting enough for him.

For _Merlin_. 

He thinks of Merlin's eyes, a beautiful blue that he just couldn't look away from. They displayed his emotions openly and clearly, Gwaine was glad that Merlin's eyes had only looked at him with curiosity and kindness reflecting within.

' _Something blue'_ , he thinks to himself, ' _small enough for what I want, but it has to stand out, something...'_ his thoughts leave him. He could hear in the back of his mind Ciara saying _'something pretty',_ but he knew what he was looking for. He moved from his spot towards the east area of the garden, just needing to find a dry area the sun would hit most of the day. He spots a variation of flowers, mostly of purples, blues and whites, but after just a little depth searching... there they were. 

Nigella flowers.

Planted in a row, the vibrant green stems packed close together made the white and blue flowers they sprouted stand out in contrast. He knelt in front of the nearest bush and began rummaging through the variously sized and colored flowers for the right one. The _perfect_ one. Nigella flowers sometimes grew awfully big, so he was trying to find ones the right size for his means. 

He finds three various sized ones he thought looked perfect, so with gentle movements, he removed them from the earth and safely tucked them away, ensuring they wouldn't be damaged before he could get them to Merlin.

Somewhere in the universe, Ciara was smirking.

_"And these?" he pointed to the bunch of spiky looking blue and white flowers._

_"Nigella flowers?" she beamed suddenly, "I can't wait to see your face when you learn about these ones."_

And in that moment, Gwaine was blushing.

[-]

It hadn't been hard to sneak out of the gardens, but it was incredibly hard to find the physicians chambers again. It felt different walking the opposite way of the direction you came, disorienting even, especially in a place as huge and unfamiliar as a palace like this.

Thankfully, Gwaine did eventually arrive back, although he wasn't alone when he did. 

An elderly man stood by the table off to the right, a potion in one hand and a vial in the other. They held eye contact until the man finally spoke. 

"I take it your leg is healing well then?" 

Gwaine's eyebrow furrowed for a moment before nodding. 

"Yeah... I take it you're the physician I owe my thanks to?" 

"Should it suit you. I was just performing my duties." he responded. 

"Thank you, sir." he winces when he takes a hesitant step further inside, closing the door behind him. The man gave a half-hearted scoff.

"Gaius will do just fine." he waved him off, "Are you experiencing any pain or discomfort?"

Gwaine in fact _was_. All the crouching and sneaking about he'd done had put some pressure on his stitches, making it ache, but it wasn't his main focus right now. The wound hadn't re-opened, meaning he was fine and therefore didn't have to deal with it, he had other things to do. Besides... it was nothing a nice afternoon in the tavern couldn't fix. 

"No. I admittedly think my head hurts worse than my leg." he mumbled, not entirely a lie. "Where's Merlin?" 

That got him a raised eyebrow in response.

"I believe serving Prince Arthur and any visiting knights he is assigned. Why?" Gaius paused his potion brewing to look at Gwaine. 

"Just wondering." Gwaine gave a simple shrug. He gave a wary look at the man and suddenly felt like the invisible weight of the flowers tucked away was out in the open. "It's not too much trouble if I stay for today, is it?"

"You are still healing, I would advise against leaving unless you want a lecture from a physician or the wrath of a Merlin on you."

Gwaine's shoulders shook as he let out an amused laugh.

"So long as it's from Merlin, I'll risk a little wrath. I'll probably rest soon, I just need to take care of something." he informs, walking up the steps to Merlin's room. 

He let out a heavy sigh once he pushed the door closed slightly behind him, leaving a small bit of space open to keep it from fully shutting. He set the flowers onto the bed and rummaged through his bag for the bit of thin wire and thread he carried and borrowed the scissors off Merlin's desk. He first cut excess stem off, then carefully encapsulating the stem of the flowers in the wire and thread.

It didn't sound like much of a process, but he ended up sitting in there for about an hour working till he was sure they were just right, not wanting to risk messing one up.

He finished attaching the last bit of string to the stem, confident in its durability and bit the thread off. He looked down at the finished pieces as he gently held them in his hands and sighed; the reality of what he'd just done settled in his mind.

He'd just broken into the royal gardens just to steal flowers for Merlin.

An ache in his heart formed when he reminded himself that he'd _just_ met Merlin _yesterday_ , he might not return his feelings and hell- Gwaine wasn't even sure he understood his _own_ feelings.

With a defeated sigh, he settled the flowers on top of the contents in his bag and stood up from the bed, coming out of Merlin's room and approached Gaius.

"Gaius, as much as I fear Merlin's wrath..." he joked, his lips tightening into a forced smile, "would you mind directing me to the nearest tavern?"

* * *

"Oh, Gwen! There you are, perfect. Can you do me a favor?" one of the council members' servants approached Gwen before she got to the staircase to check on Morgana.

"Of course, what is it?" she smiles. The servant handed her a paper, which she took and began going over. She frowned when she finished. 

"I know, I don't understand it either." the servant frowned as well, having recognized her expression. "That needs to be given to Merlin, but I've already got too much to do for the council members. They shouldn't affect you as badly as Merlin, but right now those are our orders. Not much we can do about it." 

"Hardly seems fair... Merlin has so much on his plate already." she sighed. "I'll get this to him. Any idea where he is?" 

"Laundry room, I believe." 

With that, Gwen set off. Carefully hurrying down the stairs to the wash room and stepping inside. Merlin was in the middle of washing clothes when she entered. 

"Hey Gwen. Everything alright?" he smiled hesitantly. 

"I hope so. I'm not too sure what's going on right now, but there's been an odd schedule change." she held out the paper so he could read without getting it wet. 

Merlin frowned at the paper he read. 

Servants had normal duties to attend to on a daily basis, but when events like the melee came up they would instead be dividedly assigned daily or hourly schedules with their jobs to orderly and neatly accommodate their guests. 

According to this paper, _all_ of Merlin's time for today was supposed to be dedicated to Arthur, Sir Oswald and Sir Ethan.

"I... does Arthur know about this?" 

"Unfortunately Merlin I don't think it would make a difference." she frowned. "I'll take care of the deliveries you make for Gaius, I've got most of the day off." 

"Thank you Gwen." Merlin was still frowning as he dried his hands and rummaged through a section of the room for something. "This is for Oliva, she should be on shift soon if you want to wait a while." he said as he handed her the items. 

"I don't mean to pry Merlin, but... you seem really upset about this. Has something happened?" she frowned. 

"No." _Not yet_ , he bitterly thought, flinching at the memory. He felt her hand gently rest on his arm to give a reassuring squeeze. 

"If anything happens, go straight to Arthur. He'll take care of it." she said as faithfully and loyally as he would've. He nodded his head and gave the best reassuring smile to her he could before returning to his chores. In the back of his mind, he hears it, Sir Oswald's voice.

_"We'll require your services again soon. When we do, you are to come immediately and obey."_

* * *

_Two drinks,_ Gwaine told himself when he entered the small tavern Gaius had ( _hesitantly_ ) directed him too. 

One for the feeling of unrequited love.

One for Ciara. 

And after he had finished that second drink, he waved the bartender over for another one for good measure. 

"Rough day?" one of the patrons had asked him after taking a seat beside him. 

"Mhm." he could only hum in response as he drank. He probably wouldn't have responded at all, but the funny feeling that always came after a good flagon of ale had him feeling unguarded.

He was normally always up for engaging with others in whatever tavern he found himself in, usually seating himself at a random table and making conversation. But right now he hated the thought of being around anyone, especially when he wasn't at his best. He didn't want to play nice with other people and he didn't want to pretend to be their friend and coerce drinks from them once he wasn't able to afford anymore.

Maybe that was why he didn't _have_ friends.

He grimaced and nodded to his empty tankard, the bartender supplying his fourth drink. The man beside him gave him a friendly smack on the back and an irritating smile. 

"So what's her name then?" 

"Who?" his eyes squinted as he looked at the man. He hadn't come in with anyone and there weren't any females in his vicinity, save for the serving girl across the tavern. 

"The girl you're drinking because of. No man comes in here with a thirst like that with a clear conscience." 

"It's... it's complicated." he sighed, because it was. _Nothing_ about the situation he'd found himself in was easy to explain or understand. How would he even go about giving the flowers to Merlin? And if he did figure that out, how would he handle how Merlin reacted? _Could_ he handle it? He's been rejected plenty of times before, he always expected it, but this was different. This was the first time he _feared_ facing rejection. But if Merlin didn't reject him, then... then...

"You really feel for 'em, don't you?" the man asked with a knowing grin. "How about this, come sit with my pals and I, tell us about your swain and we'll drink over it." 

"Sounds lovely." Gwaine hoped the terse smile on his face passed for acceptable as he downed the last of his drink. He stumbled with the man to their table. He felt drained as he vaguely describes his situation, vaguely describing Merlin and what the lad was doing to his heart. 

_Just a few more,_ he told himself when the bar wench carried over a tray of various alcohols. 

He didn't quite remember what followed in the hours after his... whatever-teenth drink, but he just remembered feeling elated and thinking of striking blue eyes and high cheekbones. 

" _Gwaine_?" a familiar voice called to him. He lifted his head from staring down into his half empty tankard and looked to his left, breaking out into a grin. 

"Gwen! Fancy seeing you here. Care to join me for a drink?" he smiled brightly. 

"No- No thank you, Gwaine. I just came to drop something off to Olivia and I saw you." she frowned, looking at Gwaine's glazed eyes. 

"Ah. Shame you won't stay. Where's Merlin?" he asked, tilting his head back as he finished off his drink. 

Gwen tilted her head at that suddenly. 

"Merlin? You know Merlin?" she frowned. 

"Yeah, he's great. He's got nice..." he vaguely gestures to his eyes, "nice eyes. A nice face. Big ears though." he chuckled to himself. 

"Right... um." Gwen bit her lip, not liking the thought of Gwaine staying here in this condition and possibly making himself worse. "Well in that case, how about we get you back to him and you can rest? He'll look after you." 

"You think so? I'd like that." he nodded, debating another quick mug of mead but was cut off when Gwen took his tankard and set it aside. She moved to help him stand up and leave, but was stopped by the bartender's hard stare. 

"He still has to pay." he said, leaving no room for discussion and glaring down at the two. 

"Of course. Gwaine? Do you... oh..." she frowned at the innocent-guilty smile on his face as he shrugged. She sighed heavily and led him over to a nearby table and seated himself down. She walked over to Oliva and asked for his bill. She checked her purse first, not seeing a lot and feeling worry rise. Her worry turned to dread when she saw the bill and looked at Gwaine with a shocked look. 

She didn't judge him, she felt for him, but she couldn't feel for him when he had managed a bill this high. She didn't have enough, he didn't have enough, and given that he apparently knows Merlin, that left her with one other option. 

"I'll be right back. Stay here and do not drink anymore. Understand?" she gave her best stern voice, watching a lazy grin form on his face in response. 

She sighed, making her way out of the tavern and to the castles physician's chambers. 

* * *

After about 4 hours of working, Merlin _finally_ returned to his and Gaius's chambers to eat. He didn't comment on Gwaine's absence, but he felt his heart flutter at the sight of Gwaine's belongings still neatly kept in his room. 

Still uncomfortable and more than exhausted from serving Arthur _and_ Sir Oswald and Sir Ethan, he had felt drained of almost all his energy. He was dreading getting back to work, but the sooner he did, the sooner it was over and the sooner he could pretend it never happened.

He didn't ask Gaius where Gwaine was when he sat down across from his guardian, he didn't ask Gaius anything in fact and instead hurriedly began eating. He knew that he was going to have to be prepared to serve the visiting knights again afterwards, and because both of them, _specifically_ Sir Oswald, were pushing him to his limits, he was going to need every bit of strength he could get.

He wasn't even aware of his unpleasant sounds as he ate until Gaius commented on it.

"Sorry Gaius, I just haven't had anything to eat all day. Sir Oswald had me at his beck and call all day. They- the knights- gods Gaius they're _terrible_ and I can't even _think_ about bringing it up to Arthur and even if I _wanted_ to I wouldn't be able too since there was some weird change in jobs for the day and-"

"Merlin- soup is not meant to be inhaled and your words shouldn't be either. _B_ _reathe_ , my boy." Gaius interrupted him and patted his hand with a sympathetic frown. He waited till Merlin did as instructed, taking a deep breath in and a deep breath out and settling himself down. "You say you were serving Sir Oswald? How is he?"

"Awful." Merlin grimaced. "He treats me like dirt."

"That doesn't sound like the young man I knew." Gaius frowned. "He always appeared to be a rather kind and thoughtful soul." 

"You sure we're talking about the same Sir Oswald?" Merlin scoffed incredulously. Sir Oswald? _Kind and thoughtful_? Those two words belonged nowhere near a description of the man. "He must've changed." he eventually mumbled, reaching over to take a drink from his cup. 

"Even if so, you must remember Merlin that not all masters are as good to their servants as Arthur." Gaius said.

Merlin choked on his drink at that, gracelessly turning his head to the side and coughing up the water stuck in his esophagus.

" _What_?" he barely managed to wheeze out before returning to coughing. Gaius merely gave a sympathetic pat on the back, located just right to actually help Merlin clear his throat and finally settle down.

Gaius had handed him a rag to clean the water from his mouth with when there was a gentle knock at the door, they both turned to see Guinevere halfway stepping inside. She paused at the sight of the state Merlin was in and furrowed her brows confusedly before speaking. 

"Merlin, I think you should come with me."

"Is everything alright?" he frowned

"Ah... it's Gwaine." she said.

Merlin felt his heart sink. He and Gaius spared each other conflicted glances before he hurriedly stood from the table and followed her out the door. 

* * *

When Gwen had told him that Gwaine was in trouble, Merlin didn't know what to expect. 

What he wasn't expecting was a bill thrust into his hands and a demand that he pay. 

His eyes went wide as he read cost _twice_ and turned to look at Gwaine incredulously.

"You drank all this?" he gaped.

"With the help of my new friends!" Gwaine drunkenly beamed. He was being held up by the man he'd been approached by. 

He didn't mean it though and he had a grateful feeling Merlin couldn't tell. He noted that Merlin didn't look mad, even though Gwaine thinks he absolutely should've, but instead he sighed.

"He hasn't got the money for it." The bartender explained, grabbing Merlin by his jacket and lifting him up to create as much intimidation as possible despite the height difference. "So you'll have to." he glared.

"Wh-" Merlin was startled by the sudden act and tensed up. "I can't afford this!" he frowned.

"Then you'd better find someone who can." the man hissed and let go of him. Merlin let out a nervous breath and turned to look at Gwaine, who had stiffened to full height and was now looking a little bit more sober. When they made eye contact though he seemed to have relaxed, Gwaine now gave him a bright smile again and broke out into laughter.

He watched as Merlin's eyes softened for a moment, even if at the pathetic sight of him. It reminded him of why he had snuck into the royal gardens, the same gentle blue eyes that he'd grown to love. But then it reminded him why he had been drowning himself in alcohol. 

Merlin took the bill and gave a polite smile. "I'll get the money to you before the end of today. Let me take him home?" he nervously smiled. The bartender nodded with a huff and returned to business. Gwaine hands his tankard to the man supporting him up and gestures him away. He keeps himself standing by leaning against the table and eyeing the two.

Merlin folds the paper and handed it to Gwen, but before she could say anything he lowered his voice and directed her where to go. Gwaine watched as her eyes went wide and went to protest, but their conversation was unheard to Gwaine, so he wasn't sure what Merlin was explaining. All he knew was that judging by the looks on their faces, whatever solution Merlin had just come up with, neither of them liked it. 

He was caught up staring at Merlin as Gwen left when he suddenly turned and stalked up to Gwaine, he lost his footing and stumbled, nearly falling over. He steadied himself, feeling as Merlin's arm wrapped around his waist and the other pulling his arm over his shoulders. 

"Let's get going Gwaine, you need to rest." he said, his tone unreadable.

Gwaine stumbled as Merlin attempted to hold his weight and ease him out the door of the tavern and make their way back to the palace and to his chambers. 

"Arthur's going to kill me when he sees the bill." Merlin sighs heavily. 

"Arthur?" Gwaine questioned, turning to look at Merlin which turned out to be a bad idea since he slumped forward and almost fell from Merlin's grip. The lad was surprisingly strong, tightening his grip as he hauled Gwaine back up. 

"Yep." he grunted as he draped his arm back over his shoulder. "I won't be able to pay that, I would never ask Gwen or Gaius to... Arthur will understand. If not, I'll think of something." he smiled. 

"I'm sorry to put all this on you." Gwaine frowned. 

"Don't worry about it. I'm your friend, I'm happy to help." Merlin beamed at him, his smile held as he helped him through the door to his chambers. Gaius was there, sitting at his post by the door and was reading when they stumbled inside. He didn't say anything, just stared for a moment before returning to his book.

They crossed the room in silence and stumbled up the stairs to his room. Merlin ineptly kicked his door closed, he planned on having a talk with Gwaine and unleashing a little wrath on him for his reckless actions.

"You're the best friend I've ever had." Gwaine suddenly said, grinning as he stumbled inside. 

"You seem to have quite a lot of those." Merlin eased him onto the bed. His plans for wrath didn't last long when Gwaine broke out laughing again, rolling over to face him, feeling elated at the sight of Merlin's following laughter.

"I'd love to see the look on Arthur's face when he gets that bill." he chuckled, straining to adjust himself on the bed. 

"That's it-" Merlin huffed, moving to sit himself on the other side of the bed to give Gwaine room to lay down, "what is it with you and nobles?" he asked.

"Nothing huge." he sighed heavily, head turning over to hold their gazes. "My father was a knight. Caerlon's army." he explained, watching the genuine surprise form on Merlin's face. "I can hardly remember him, he died in battle. He left me and my family in poverty to struggle for every piece of bread." he felt his heart growing heavy, not sure if it was from the summary of his childhood or the sympathetic hurt in Merlin's eyes. "When it became too much, my mother went to the king for help. And what did he do to help? He turned her away." he glared at nothing. 

There was a heavy silence that followed, Gwaine couldn't tell if he appreciated or was unnerved by it, but Merlin did eventually speak. 

"Your father... you didn't know him?"

"Only through the few stories my mother had to tell." 

"I know how that feels." Merlin frowned, lowering his gaze to his hands. Gwaine's eyebrows furrowed, waiting and hoping Merlin might choose to elaborate. He did. "I met my father just briefly before he died." 

Merlin looked vulnerable, his eyes sad and heavy in striking contrast to the eager and grinning lad he'd been seeing. 

"You didn't know him either?" he asked, pushing himself to sit up straight and give Merlin all his attention. Merlin shook his head, hesitating to continue.

"No, he... he was banished." he explained. 

"What'd he do?"

"Nothing." Merlin mumbled, his tone changing to something familiar. "He served the king."

"But the king turned against him?" Gwaine knew where it was going, only confirmed by the flexing and shift of Merlin's jaw. He scoffed. "Can't say I'm surprised. Nobel's like that? They're all the same." 

"Arthur's not like that." 

"Ha! I'm sure he isn't." Gwaine rolled his eyes. He leaned forward and grasped Merlin's shoulder. "But none of them are worth our lives, hm?" he held a stern look on his face before letting out a small laugh. Glad to see Merlin smiling, he moved to lean back, but given his disorientation from too much alcohol and his depth perception out the window, he wound up knocking his head against the wall. He let out a brief wince, but began shaking with laughter again.

He was extremely happy to see Merlin laughing too. The sound was sobering him up, the smile on his face was terribly beautiful and Gwaine felt several different urges rising in him.

Merlin moved to stand and help Gwaine comfortably settle into bed, but paused when Gwaine grabbed his wrist and shook his head. 

"Wait, Merlin?" he asked, sitting himself back up. Merlin's eyebrows twitched together in confusion, but he quietly seated himself back down on the bedside. "I... ah, don't laugh, but..." he trailed off.

Gwaine wanted to look at him just a bit longer, his hold on Merlin's wrist lowering to instead gently hold his fingers. That comforting buzz that kept him light was leaving, he felt heavily engrossed in the moment. 

"Gwaine?" he whispered. 

Their eyes held each other's gaze, gentle stares and unspoken words between them. 

He finally managed to pull himself from his daze and reached into his bag, never letting go of Merlin's hands as he pulled out the small flower from his bag. Merlin's eyes were carefully watching him and his movements, never straying, but he also never moved away.

"I hope you don't hate this... or me." he smiled unsurely. "Especially since I broke into the royal gardens for this." 

"You- _what_?" Merlin gaped, looking between the flower and Gwaine, waiting for him to say he was joking, but he didn't. "When did you have time for that?" 

"Sometime after you left this morning." Gwaine chuckled. He actually had no idea how long it'd taken him to get it. 

"You didn't get caught either? Have to say I'm impressed." Merlin mumbled, his expression softening as he looked at the flower. It was beautiful, its size giving detail that made it stand out. It had light blue pointed tips, thin, layered and lifted that faded to a darker blue around the vine-y green and purple pistil. 

"I-It's beautiful." he felt his face flush when his mind caught up to him that Gwaine got it for him. 

"Nigella flowers. Not nearly as easy as you'd think to find one small enough like this." he chuckled, looking down at it before looking back to Merlin's eyes.

"I-I..." Merlin wanted to say something, anything, but he was at a loss... a complete and utter loss.

"May I?" Gwaine smiled. Merlin could only nod his head.

Tentatively, he reached forward and tucked the flower behind Merlin's ear, carefully bending the stem enwrapped in wire so it stayed secure in place.

He let his hand hover for a moment before lowering and gently cupped Merlin's cheek, stroking the prominent cheekbone with his thumb.

"Wh-What do you think?" Merlin found himself struggling to hold Gwaine's gaze.

Gwaine didn't answer, instead leaning forward and placing a quick, chaste kiss to his lips.

"I think you're beautiful." he mumbles softly when he pulled back, gently running his thumb along Merlin's bottom lip before pulling him into another kiss. 

This time Merlin was able to kiss back, his hands lifted to gently hold onto Gwaine's arms. 

Seconds or minutes passed, they weren't sure, but they parted eventually. Gwaine began gently touching the stem behind his ear, adjusting it and smiling.

"Sometimes they're called _love in a mist_." he spoke quietly. Merlin's face flushed as he looked between Gwaine's eyes.

"Do... does this... are you...?"

"Yes." Gwaine could tell what he was trying to ask. He'd been asking himself the same things all day. "I won't rush you into anything though, alright?" He kissed Merlin's forehead. He received a nod in response, Merlin carefully easing Gwaine to lay back down on the bed.

"Th-Thank you." he stuttered out, his face reddening even more at the playful grin that Gwaine splayed out. 

"For what?" 

The flower, thinking of him, calling him beautiful, not pressuring him, the gentleness, the kiss...

"Everything." he quietly managed out. He gave a gentle kiss to Gwaine's cheek. "Sleep well, Gwaine." he smiled. 

"Mmh, I'm sure I will." he smiled, lying back down. Merlin didn't even hide the feeling of elated embarrassment he felt.

He only left his room once Gwaine was fully settled down and sleeping. He closed the door to his room quietly, his face red and breathing ragged.

Merlin felt Gauis's stare on him linger as he halfway crossed the room to the door.

Tensely, he paused himself and turned his head to meet Gaius's unreadable stare and judgmental eyebrow. Only Gaius wasn't judging...at least Merlin _think's_ he's not judging, but he definitely looked like he was questioning.

"I-I should probably get back to Arthur..."

"Indeed." Gaius tilted his head downward to look at his ward over his glasses and turned a page in his book without breaking eye contact. Merlin narrowed his eyes at his guardian, taking slow steps towards the door till his outstretched hand grasped the handle. 

"I'll be back in time for supper, hopefully. If not then don't wait up for me." he says, opening the doorwithout breaking eye contact. He turns to leave and escape the unexplained tension, just _barely_ getting out the door before Gaius's voice begins speaking again. 

"Merlin?"

Merlin turned halfway to make uncomfortable eye contact with Gaius again.

"Yes?" he gave a tense smile. Gaius was still staring.

"A Nigella flower suits you well," he says. Gaius's unyielding composure breaks and now he's holding back laughter.

Merlin's face completely flushed red. He nervously adjusted the flower tucked behind his ear and gave a sheepish smile. 

"I-It's from Gwaine." he said. 

"So I gathered." Gaius isn't even _trying_ to hide his non-malicious laughter. He looked back down to his book and shooed Merlin along, who promptly turned and slammed the door closed behind him.

For the second time that day, Merlin fled.


End file.
